But what have you learned?

Recently I have talked parenting with a few childless (and well rested) friends, a question that has come up each time is 'what have you learned?' 

Well, I've leaned lots of things, I've learned to change a nappy whilst Tom is standing up (read: running away), I've learned to have a conversation whilst Tom is loudly playing (read: screaming and running away) and and I've learned to clean my house, make dinner and write an essay whilst chatting with a toddler (read: nodding along to him screaming). Basically you learn to multitask. 

But there is something I haven't really leant, how do you deal with not sleeping? Mr B is starting to be up with Tom during the night more and he thinks that I've already learnt to cope with the not sleeping but I'm not so sure. 

I am so tired, I am so tired I forgot the word spoon, unusual considering they are now the implement I used about fifty times a day. I am so tired I now do microsleeps, whilst walking. I am so tired I actually crave sugar for energy, I had not experienced this before! 

I don't know if you get do learn to manage the lack of sleep? I am running on the fumes that one day he will just give it up and sleep properly. Or that I will become a supreme being who can survive on Reeces Pieces and cold tea.

So I guess this is a bit moany and not particularly reassuring to the person looking for the answer of how to get a toddler to sleep through the night. But, it shows thy no matter how tired you arroyo can gulp down that cold tea, spray on that dry shampoo and crack on. You can do it mama!

You actually know you are tired when...

I recently read some bullpoop article on Netmums or the like, along the lines of you know when your tired when... You want to sleep when you wake up. 

Well sorry Netmums, I felt like that before I was a parent! So here is my real 10 things you know you are actually tired when...

1. You miss words out of sentences, written and verbal. Seriously, I think I've said a full sentence but 9/10 I've missed at least one full word. Worrying

2. You forget words, simple words. Like carrot. You try to remember the word by discussing "the orange things" with you toddler in Aldi. Awkward 

3. You go to the microwave with tea that has gone cold, to find the reheated cup of tea that went cold three hours ago *sigh* 45 seconds, try not to forget

4. You wake up but can't remember putting your baby in the cot so you frantically scrabble looking for a baby that isn't there. Cue being wide awake holding a 'pillow baby'

5. You can sleep anywhere, anytime. You will micro sleep in the bath. If you are still, you will sleep. Poo sleeps will become the norm

6. You want to punch everyone in the face, mainly the twats who say "I only slept for four hours last night" ... Only?!? Only four hours??? How hard for you

7. You consider phoning in sick to work once your baby is at childcare, but you have to work to pay for childcare. You then spend the entire day at work wondering if you can get out early to sleep before picking your baba up. 

8. You could sleep from 5pm through to 4:30pm the next day, sadly you will never, never get to test the theory 

9. You stare at your baby in disbelief and jealousy when he doesn't want to sleep in his cot, your fantasy is a snuggley bed with a nightlight! 

10. You never see the end of a film, or the middle, or the end of the opening credits ... Zzzz

I hope this was a bit more realistic! Let me know what extreme tiredness you have experienced?