The Parental Facade : Lies We All Tell

I was recently at a work function in which I was asked if Tom sleeps through the night. I think it's fair to say my regular readers know the answer is LIKE FUCK! My actual answer was, "Well, he hasn't been well, but before that we was doing well"

"Doing well"

No we wasn't doing well, we just wasn't doing as badly as we were before 'doing well'. Sometimes he did, sometimes he didn't. 

I think we are all guilty of it, just prettying up the truth. We don't want our child or our parenting to be judged so we... Well ... We make our child seem a bit 'better' than perhaps they are...? 

1. Can he walk yet? Pah, he is practically a member of Stomp 

... Well the noisey part is true 

2. Is he a good eater? His first word may as well have been quinoa. Can't get him away from carrots  

... Mainly in the form of the Organix carrot sticks, but still it's carrot favour, right?!

3. Isnt he a good boy? Oh he is so full of spirit! He loves playing!

... Based on his energy levels, he could be Drop Dead Fred and Beetlejuice's love child

4. Can he talk? He has some key words and he speech is really coming along

... Mama = I want

Bananas = all food

Cat = get back here, I want to love you 

Dada = everything else

6. He is so handsome! I know, I love him so much

... Well I wouldn't endure a 26 hour labour for the sake of it! 

Do you find yourself in these situations? It can't just be me!