My vampire son : Tom was a biter

Tom was a biter, I say was as now we are on the occasional nip and that I consider to be more in line with the non biting society we live in. I have put off this post for a long time as I was a bit embarrassed, I was the only one of my friends (so far) to have a biter, and so I naturally felt that I had done something wrong. Now we are through that I would like to point out that I most certainly no longer feel that way. 

Tom is an excitable child, who is ... 'Spirited'. I truly wouldn't have it any other way, yes he has a lot of energy but he is also quite free with his emotion and has so much he wants you to experience with him. I think this is where the biting came from, either he would bite from frustration or from excitement. I think that Tom didn't know what to do with the excitement/anxious energy he was experiencing so he would bite as an outlet. 

Largely it was contained to me and sometimes Mr B, although on occasion he would give other people a nip. It is embarrassing and I think admitting that is important as no-one really talks about it, so you are left feeling quite alone. It's also difficult because it felt that people looked to you for a reaction (naturally) but sometimes I would feel judged that I wasn't handling how they would like. It's tricky when you feel you have to justify the choices you are making, especially when you are actually in pain! 

It's also worth stating, it bloody hurts (as obvious as it sounds)! A few times people would laugh and that's quite annoying when you are trying to intervene with the behaviour and check if your not bleeding! And having to explain the bruises is pretty embarrassing too!

What did we do? 

When Tom bit I would use a flat hand and 'brush' between his teeth and my skin/clothes to break the bite. I would then point at where he bit and say "Bad biting". That's all, no bells and whistles on this! I think it worked (eventually!) because the reaction was consistent, the scripted nature of it stopped me expressing when I was really angry or hurt, because of this Tom wasn't getting the reaction he wanted in relation to what he was trying to express (I think! I'm no toddle whisperer!). This took a few months to take hold but he did eventually get the message- or the phases blew over? Let's go with 'it worked!'

What could we have done better? 

I know some people say about biting back being a quick solution to biting bitten, I'm really not feeling that. I think I could have quicker off the mark in getting into a set method of dealing with the bahaviour. I also wish I had been more firm in getting the people around me to do the same to make it clear to Tom that the behaviour isn't acceptable. Shoulda Woulda Coulda! 

My message to you if you are experiencing this is consistentcey is key and that it will end one day! Stick with it mama! 

Look at the gnashers! Acting like butter wouldn't melt!